SPORTS
Hua Hin Hash House Harriers
The 107th Hua Hin Hash House Harriers run went off with a splash or two on Satuday 13th October. Hared by Scotch Tape and Dazzlin’ the run was over an area to the West of Hua Hin known colloquially as Pedro’s Patch and as a seasonal concession this particular trail was immortalised as Pedro’s Puddles. Jupiter Pluvius did his part by topping up the puddles on Thursday night and most of the day on Saturday until they were brimful or overflowing for the occasion, which was blessedly dry and sunny.
So there we were just like a younger Bridget Jones, only twenty-something of us surging and splurging as we “skelpit on through dub and mire” along a quite
picturesque trail. Lesser temporary puddles were circumvented, leapt over, or blithely ignored as we progressed from Primary Puddle to Secondary Puddle where the runners’ and walkers’ trails diverged to send the runners round a positive plethora of pretty puddles before rejoining the walkers trail near the Polystyrene Puddle.
Things progressed from bad to worse as people were sucked into quagmires and rescued reluctantly by fellow Hashers who were anxiously looking out for crocodiles, alligators, or other swamp creatures. Some
of the bushy parts were intimidatingly high for those of lesser stature and Ballbanger was heard to remark wistfully that he felt like a FOKAWI tribesman. Fortunately we were unable to provide him with one at
that precise moment.
If it’s not one damn thing it’s another - now we are in cow country and the cows are disputing the trail with us and staking their claim in their own inimitable manner by overlaying our soggy multi-coloured paper with their own soggy brown offerings. Yet another underfoot hazard to watch out
for between puddles. And so to the Penultimate Puddle and a little bit more bush before emerging on to the home stretch - not the home straight - because a little bit more ducking and diving was still required
to avoid the assegai-like thorns on the local
vegetation.
It was about here that things started to go seriously wrong. The walkers under the auspices of Space Cowboy abandoned the trail and headed for the highway that
leads to Banwungkata. Fortuitously they turned right, away from Banwungkata, or they might still be trudging along towards Soi 112 hoping to reach Hua Hin in time for the December edition. This right turn brought them to the HHH sign on the highway directing Hashers to the meeting point so they headed back to the cars at a rate of knots.
Meanwhile, back at the raunch, the runners had found the trail missed by the walkers and made it as far as a tiny copse where they played ring-a-ring-a-roses for 20 minutes befor emerging at the wrong place saying“ forget this for a game of soldiers”, abandoning the trail and following their over-developed nasal organs back to the beer truck.
Unaware of these catastrophes Scotch Tape and Dazzlin’ were stooging around the latter part of the trail (which no one else ever reached) ready to offer aid and succour to any leg-weary stragglers. Stragglers? We never even saw the leaders until the sounds of frivolity led us back to the caravanserai where we found these tired but exhiarated booze hounds congratulating each other on a run well abandoned. Slack Bladder had the temerity to award Butt Out a down-down as a Front Running Blighter, a title as incomplete as his attempt at the run. A more apt title Would be Front Running Short Cutting Blighter. Even the otherwise indomitable 69 Forever confided with a sob in his voice that on emerging from the copse he saw the paper trail to the right but followed the others to the left thereby consigning himself to the dustbin of history as just one more SCB instead of turning the other cheek and the other way and becoming an Intrepid Hash Hero.
Soon we adjourned to the Khun Oy restaurant for the ON ON and were joined by that inveterate, veteran Hasher ROLO, who was amazed and delighted to learn that the
entire Hash had failed to complete the trail.
Surely one for the history books??
Scotch Tape
Border to Border Hash Challenge
A Hash House Harriers Odyssey of Endurance crossing Thailand from West to East.
A group of Hua Hin Hashers (H2H3) were gathered around a cooler of iced down beer at the worldwide InterHash in Chiang Mai last year after a hard run in the mountains. After a bit too much time around the cooler, someone became chemically stimulated and suggested that the Hua Hin Hash do something truly sensational in order to put the young, small and growing hash on the world hashing map. A decision was made to do something a bit unconventional from what the other great hashes in Thailand routinely do. We decided that we would not just have weekly local hash runs in Hua Hin and Cha Am. We decided to run Thailand. At the time of our inspiration, the Thaksin government had been overthrown and replaced by a militarily assisted government just before the InterHash. There had been no request for our help in running the country but we began to formulate our plan regardless. It is well known that many of the big decisions made with regard to governing Thailand are made in Hua Hin and we dedicated Hua Hin Hashers were enthusiastic about doing our part.
The H2H3 formed a mismanagement committee to plan this Odyssey of Endurance and began to map out a proposed route for running Thailand. It was decided that the run would begin at the Thai border with Burma to the west and conclude at the Thai border of Cambodia to the east. We wanted to be able to conquer the challenge in a week or less and began to plan our route in a manner that would ensure safety, simplicity, and plenty of opportunity for hash fun and nonsense. H2H3 hashers scouted out a couple of areas on the Thai-Burma border and several on the Thai-Cambodia border. The shortest distance between two points is a straight line, and so once the ideal starting point was found at a Thai-Burma border checkpoint, a straight line was drawn on the map of Thailand to determine just where near Cambodia the odyssey survivors would plant the flag and claim victory. A recce of the Thai-Cambodia border was conducted by some of our hashers and we found a suitable location. Our hares were warned by local inhabitants of the area to avoid crossing the invisible borderline as there were old landmines still to be cleared on the Cambodian side. We felt that the minefield would add an additional element of adventure and prevent front runners from running internationally without proper visas.
After studying the details of the map of Thailand we felt confident that we had a route which would be challenging but certainly possible to accomplish. We did find one impassable obstacle in our way but simply planned our way around it instead of trying to go over it.
The next step of the mismanagement committee was to invite hashers from around the world to join us. We used the internet, various HHH websites, the renown Asia-Pacific Harrier magazine (International Edition), and the excellent Hua Hin/ Cha Am Observer magazine to advertise the event which took place from the 23rd through the 27th of September. As we had decided to attempt to conquer the challenge in just five days, we joined forces with the Hua Cha Hash Pedalers, a young bicycle hash in Hua Hin and Cha Am. Since many of the H2H3 runners and walkers were also Hash Pedalers, we felt we could use tarmac to our advantage and roll swiftly along the first phase of the endeavor. We would complete the first phase where an enduring obstacle prevented further pedaling, then go on to tackle phase two on foot only.
On a sunny September 23rd, cyclists from all around the world gathered at the Thai-Burma border checkpoint high in the hills overlooking the Thai countryside south of Bangkok and as far west as Thailand goes at this latitude. Foreigners and Thais on mountain bikes, racing bikes and touring bikes crowded the parking area where they adjusted brakes, pumped up tires, oiled chains, drank water and prepared themselves for the miles ahead. When the time came to push off, all riders were facing east and a challenge none of them had ever attempted before. Good news for all of the cyclists was that because we were beginning the journey in the mountains, it would be very much downhill from the start.
After the initial downhill coast on tarmac past forested hillsides, the riders passed coconut groves, temples, rubber plantations, temples, jackfruit orchards, temples pineapple fields, cattle pastures, temples, rice paddies, farmyards, temples and mile after mile of tropical growth on the right and left much farther than the eye could see. What began as a large group of bicycle riders pedaling dangerously close to one another soon stretched out like a river of sparkling chrome and bright colors until the leaders and the slower cyclists were far apart from one another. The cyclists safely crossed roads, highways, dirt paths, railroad tracks and klongs as they made their way eastward to the beach, the first rest stop and the obstacle that would prevent them from continuing onward. The first twenty hashers to complete Phase 1 of the Odyssey included Hollow Legs, Comes First, Space Cowboy, The Mingster, Tangmo. Harry, Jose, Brian, Barry, 69 Forever, Dairy Queen, Tom Jones, Dazzlin’ Maslin, Slackbladder, Domestic Violence, Boring English Kunt, Nigel, Graham, Taipan, Noi, and Ballbanger. Dragging her tail, Dragon Tail coasted to the coast, with her foot on just one pedal most of the time, taking photos along the way. Ice Posse was also in the early lead as she forgot her bicycle and hitched a ride to the beer. Once all of the cyclist were present and accounted for we got really busy decimating the inventory of cold beer at a restaurant which provided most of us with some great Thai food. Slackbladder brought a sandwich since he thinks he does not like Thai cooking. He believes that it must all taste like the stuff his wife cooks for him at home. Ice Posse had some comments about the service but they are unprintable. In the end, Phase 1 was a wonderful experience, and added fuel to the fire of enthusiasm for Phase 2.
Phase 2 of the Odyssey of Endurance commenced the next day. We were done with the bicycles and the survivors would complete the run to the border of Cambodia on foot.
To prepare for the final phase of the challenge, the runners joined hashers from the Pattaya hash for a warm-up training exercise which involved plenty of running up hills and down. This long run on rugged terrain was hared by a couple of Pattaya harriets who demonstrated that they were certainly as smart, strong, deceitful and cunning as any of the guys who lay hash trails in Thailand. All of the Odyssey of Endurance runners passed the test and then did a recce of Pattaya bars for a few hours before calling it a day. Early the next morning we all left Pattaya for the beach south of Trat for the continuation of phase 2 and the run to the Cambodian border. The trail of Phase 2 was done by live hare and began at a car park by highway 318 north of Had Lek where an official Thai-Cambodia border crossing is located. Heading south for less than 10 kilometers, the trail took a sharp turn to the west, ending at a small fishing village and then did a U-turn to the east where it headed uphill through a coconut plantation, crossed highway 318 and proceeded onward and upward to the jungle that conceals the invisible line between the two countries. The trail snaked onward under stormy skies as the rain cooled the overheated hashers dashing through the undergrowth past boulders, trees and waterfalls on their way to the finish at the non-existent finish line.
Leading the successful completion of Thailand’s first HHH border to border cross country Odyssey of Endurance were H2H3 GM Slackbladder, Ballbanger, Dazzlin’ Maslin, Space Cowboy, and The Mingster while Chatterbox and Dragon Tail lagged just a little in case the front runners should stumble into the old minefield. Due to time constraints and space limitations we are unable to publish the names of all of the survivors who completed the odyssey or the names of all of the other hashers involved along the way.
A cross country hash odyssey deserves more than a routine circle after the run and so the hashers went north toward Trat, stopping off for the night to lick wounds and whatever, and to celebrate victory at the Golden Cliffs Beach Resort. The next day it was On On to Ko Chang and a stay at a resort on White Sand Beach. After that the hashers split up to go their separate ways back to Pattaya, Bangkok, Cha Am, Hua Hin, and other destinations in Thailand or other places around the world.
Chances are, the H2H3 will attempt a similar feat sometime later next year. In the meantime, we run every other Saturday in the Hua Hin & Cha Am Area. The Hua Cha Hash Pedalers have monthly trips. Check out www.huahin-hhh.com
Hua Hin Pool League
Premier Snooker Table Division
Pld W Dr L Dif Pts
Jungle Juice B 8 7 0 1 40 14
Jungle Juice A 8 4 1 3 2 9
Limelight Lions 7 4 0 3 0 8
Billy’s Bar 7 3 1 3 4 7
London Boys 8 2 2 4 -2 6
Sabai Bar 6 3 0 3 -6 6
U-Turn Bar 6 2 1 3 -4 5
Billy’s Babes 8 0 3 5 -34 3
Premier Pool Table Division
Pld W Dr L Dif Pts
Lucky Shot A 7 7 0 0 38 14
P & P Bar 7 5 1 1 28 11
Nung Bar 8 4 0 4 10 8
SugarCane 7 4 0 3 4 8
Butterfly Rock 8 3 1 4 -1 7
Pink Flamingo A 6 1 2 3 -25 4
Déjà Vu A 8 1 1 6 -22 3
JW Black 7 1 1 5 -32 3
Third Division
Pld W Dr L Dif Pts
Moonlight 6 4 1 1 30 9
Red Bar 6 4 1 1 30 9
Bamboo Grove 7 4 0 3 3 8
Pink Flamingo B 7 2 0 5 -34 8
Lazy Daze A 7 3 0 4 -1 6
Lips 7 3 0 4 -12 6
Dick’s Office A 7 3 0 4 -17 6
Good Friends A 5 2 0 3 1 4
Fourth Division
PLd W Dr L Dif PTs
Dick’s Office B 7 6 0 1 43 12
Dolphin Bar 7 3 2 2 10 8
Good Friends B 7 4 0 3 10 8
Lucky Shot B 7 3 1 3 8 7
BaanSuan 6 3 0 3 7 6
Love Bar 6 3 0 3 2 6
DéjàVu B 7 2 1 4 -12 5
JW Red 7 1 0 6 -54 2
Fifth Division
PLd W Dr L Dif Pts
Omah 8 7 1 0 55 15
Headrock 8 6 0 2 16 12
Queen Flower 8 5 1 2 25 11
Konhom 8 4 1 3 4 9
Mr. Dan 8 3 0 5 -15 6
Ice Cheers 8 2 0 6 -17 6
Free Time 8 2 1 5 -15 5
Lazy Daze B 8 1 0 7 -53 2
Pool League Fixtures November
Pool Division
WK DT home-away
11 07 Butterfly R - P & P,
JW Black - PF A, LS A - SugarC,
Nung - Déjà Vu A
12 14 Déjà Vu A - LS A,
Nung - JW Black,
PF A - Butterfly R,
SugarC - P & P
13 21 Butterfly R - Nung,
P & P - Déjà Vu A, PF A - LS A,
SugarC - JW Black
14 28 Déjà Vu A - SugarC,
JW Black - Butterfly R,
LS A - P & P, Nung - PF A
snooker Division
WK DT home-away
11 07 Babes - London, JJ A - Sabai,
Limelight - Billy’s,
U-Turn - JJ B
12 14 Billy’s - JJ B. JJ A - Limelight,
London - U-Turn,
Sabai - Babes
13 21 Babes - Limelight,
JJ A - U-Turn, London - Billy’s,
Sabai - JJ B
14 28 Babes - JJ A, JJ B - London,
Limelight - Sabai,
U-Turn - Billy’s
Division 3
WK DT home-away
11 07 Bamboo - M’light,
Lips - Dick’s A, PF B - GF A,
Red - Lazy D A
12 14 Dick’s A - Lazy D A, Lips - GF A,
M’light - Red, PF B - Bamboo
13 21 Bamboo - Lips, GF A - Red,
M’light - Dick’s A,
PF B - Lazy D A
14 28 Bamboo - GF A,
Lazy D A - M’light, Lips - PF B,
Red - Dick’s A
Division 4
wk dt home-away
11 07 DéjàVu B - JW Red,
Dick’s B - LS B,
GF B - BaanSuan,
Love - Dolphin
12 14 BaanSuan - Dolphin,
GF B - Dick’s B, JW Red - Love,
LS B - DéjàVu B
13 21 DéjàVu B - GF B, Dick’s B - Love,
JW Red - BaanSuan,
LS B - Dolphin
14 28 Dick’s B - DéjàVu B,
Dolphin - JW Red, GF B - LS B,
Love - BaanSuan
Division 5
WK DT home-away
11 07 Konhom - MrDan,
HRock - Omah,
LazyDB - FreeTime,
Queen F - Ice C
12 14 FreeTime - Ice C,
LazyDB - HRock,
MrDan - Queen F,
Omah - Konhom
13 21 HRock - Queen F, Ice C - Omah,
LazyDB - Konhom,
MrDan - FreeTime
14 28 Konhom - HRock,
Ice C - MrDan,
Queen F - FreeTime,
Omah - LazyDB
Hua Hin Darts
The Hua Hin Darts League season 7 finished on Tuesday 2nd October with the top 16 tournament. This season’s league winners were the defending champions Johnny Walker Black who managed to keep Cat Bar two points behind them. In the cup final Jungle Juice beat Pink Flamingo 6-5 after a very exciting match. Individual champion came from Jungle Juice, Stuart beating Tao from Cat Bar 4-1 in the final.
The new season was due to start on 30th October with the major change being that due to the popularity of the competition and the increasing number of teams, there are going to be two divisions for the first time.
There is also a strong possibility that the new sponsors will be San Miguel - watch this space!
The darts league plays every Tuesday, and for details of participating teams, fixtures and regular updates, please contact Jill or Barry at Johnnie Walkers, or via email barrypm@hotmail.com
FIXTURES FOR NOVEMBER
Division 1
Week 2 - 6th November 2007
Bamboo Grove - JW Red,
Pink Flamingo - Jaew,
Dick’s Office 1 - Jungle Juice,
JW Black - Cat
Week 3 - 13th November 2007
Cat - Bamboo Grove,
Jungle Juice - JW Black,
Jaew - Dick’s Office 1,
JW Red - Pink Flamingo
Week 4 - 20th November 2007
Bamboo Grove - Pink Flamingo,
Dick’s Office 1 - JW Red,
JW Black - Jaew, Cat - Jungle Juice
Week 5 - 27th November 2007
Cup 1st Round
Division 2
Week 2 - 6th November 2007
Eero - Love Bar,
Deja Vu - Bamboo Shoots,
Mojo’s Trio - Dick’s Office 2,
Lazy Daze - Good Friends
Week 3 - 13rd November 2007
Good Friends - Eero,
Dick’s Office 2 - Lazy Daze,
Bamboo Shoots - Mojo’s Trio,
Love Bar - Deja Vu
Week 4 - 20th November 2007
Eero - Deja Vu, Mojo’s Trio - Love Bar,
Lazy Daze - Bamboo Shoots,
Good Friends - Dick’s Office 2
Week 5 - 27th November 2007
Cup 1st Round
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