SPORTS
Hua Hin Hash House Harriers
H2H3 WANDERING STARS On 19th January 2008 an adequate complement of Hua Hin Hash House Harriers assembled in a remote area, along a tank test track, to the right of the Hup Ka Pong road to participate in H2H3’s Run No.114. The Hares were Ballbanger and 69 Forever and the proceedings were presided over in avuncular fashion by the new Great Man - Miserable Dave York City. After a few false starts and being recalled to receive further gratuitous advice from the Hares, the complete contingent set off and very soon showed the shape of things to come when Curly Keith the ex-copper led a raiding party down the wrong fork in trail and had to be chastised and re-directed back on track by the stentorian tones of Ballbanger. Having got everyone back onside we all proceeded along fairly well defined but
inadequately marked trails through some very decent Hashing terrain. The pack strung itself out as usual and the runners disappeared over the horizon but then reappeared soon afterwards when they had difficulty negotiating checkpoints thereby allowing the lame and last to catch up to them. Particular features of this scenic trail included plummeting sandy slopes which required careful navigation and a scintillating sylvan scenario through a delightful grove of young trees where a large number of participants seemed to depart from the follow-my-leader principle and succumbed to the headless chicken syndrome. This situation seemed to prevail for an inordinate length of time until a faint and distant cry of “On On” induced a latter-day “Charge of the Light Brigade” out through the tree line into more open
territory. And so we progressed in casual bantering fashion, most of us unaware of the dramas that were about to unfold in various areas of the pack. 69Forever who was the principal Hare reckoned to have laid a foolproof trail but despite his longevity,
physical and temporal, he obviouslyseriously underrates a Hasher’s propensity to wander. Run 114 produced at least FIVE undeniable wandering stars but the Lee
Marvin award for the star that shine “abune them a’” must go to 69 Forever who went irretrievably astray on his own trail! This is a feat unachieved by an H2H3 Hasher since a pillock named Pedro (his name has since been changed to protect the innocent) did the same thing in May 2006 around that DAM place, coincidentally (or is it?) while co-haring with Ballbanger. Other Happy Wanderers were Mary Can Can and Iron Lady who finished up at a farm and Old MacDonald who couldn’t even find his farm. No cogent explanation has been offered or received from these recalcitrants
but the remaining wandering star’s case is fully documented. Lucky Old Scotch Tape also got LOST but he is the first to claim responsibility for his own predicament in
that he committed the most heinous crime in the Hasher’s Calendar - he attempted to shortcut and was UNSUCCESSFUL! However, just as no good deed ever goes unpunished, so equally no misdemeanour ever goes unrewarded so Scotch Tape’s benefit from indulging in his innovative itinerary was to be excused the excoriating egotistical excesses of the exhibitionists in the Down Down circle. In the mildly alcoholic atmosphere contrived by a plenitude of beer and a record number of absentees, Miserable Dave You Champion dispensed Down Downs to visitors, returners, (i.e. returners from previous Hashes - not returners from this one!), and miserable miscreants. Eventually, when enough survivors had been gathered up to make it hardly worthwhile to call out the Rescue Services, the circle was closed and the tipsy travellers were allowed to proceed to the Chicken Coop for the OnOn and Mother Hen’s Birthday Party.
DOWN IN THE DUMPS Run 115 of the H2H3 eventuated to the right of Soi 112 on the afternoon of Saturday 2nd February 2008. The site of the forming-up point was a porticoed carpark in the immediate environs of the Hua Hin town dump and our olfactory senses soon informed us that we were leeward of that location. Numbers were encouragingly high and some forty-three variegated souls set off at various times to seek the paper trail to glory. Hares Scotch Tape and Ballbanger issued dire warnings orally and in writing of the dangers of encountering a Kansas cattle drive along the way and beseeched the Hashers to desist from barbecuing or otherwise molesting any cows, calves or other bovine beasts. So “out the Hellish Legion sallied” across the scrubby bush beginnings, negotiating the barbed wire and electrified fences and traversing the pineapple fields, all the while ignoring carefully positioned checkpoints with the nonchalance of true veterans. Soon the area of potential neat nastiness was reached and passed through without untoward incident while the potential predators were observed inside the fence peacefully picnicking on the rather doubtful detritus of the rubbish dump. At this point the Flying Squad arrived in the persona of Sparky, Long Ron and Mickey Mou, who had taken the scenic route from the Chicken Coop so as to give the rest of the pack a head start. Now to the sin of
tardiness they added blatant high-speed shortcutting to their list of nefarious activities as they blithely ignored paper and zero-ed in on people. They were not welcomed by the more respectable participants as their first contribution to the afternoon’s delight was to lead everyone else astray as they attempted to prolong their shortcutting saga.
Scotch Tape, sweeping up at the back, felt a surge of sympathy so guided the unrevered Cannonballs in the right direction by pointing towards the towering eminence of the Roman Ruins so beloved by Ballbanger. Only the absolute apogee
was visible in the distance and indeed from this angle the white marble reflecting in the sun looked more like the tip of the Sierra Madre which was an ominous portent for the Runners who were a mere few minutes away from confronting a mother of a hill! From here everyone progressed placidly through a succession of scrub and thickets as they lolloped languidly along the labyrinthine lanes of Pedro’s Patch until they reached the parting of the ways. Here the ubiquitous Scotch Tape waited once again to ensure that only the Runners rushed in where angels fear to tread, while the Walkers took a shorter way to salvation. Before long the Runners embarked on the
aforementioned hill and slogged onwards and upwards over the top and the down through a monastic village which afforded some spectacular panoramas out across Hua Hin, the sea, and the ImmigrationOffice. Some of the lesser attractions of the area are the dogs and Mudman found himself engaged in a dog-handling debate witha local canine sympathiser. Safely at the bottom of the hill the Runners were now rewarded with a gentle jog along one of the most picturesque and colourful stretches of countryside, between and amongst the brilliant blossoms of the bougainvilleas. Meanwhile the Walkers had struggled through some close country before encountering a hill of their own, but this one was all downhill so they were able to take it in their stride so to speak and scramble down to a fully fashioned footpath. The Walkers had their own dog hazard to contend with but fortunately the dogs in this particular area seemed to be out for the day -possibly visiting friends in the monks’ village. As the two trails merged and allowed the rabid Runners to mingle with the weary Walkers the On In sign was passed and Paradise Regained at the back of a pickup truck bearing a box of beer. Once a few thirsts had been slaked and a satisfactory headcount achieved our recently appointed God’s Messenger, Miserable Dave You Charmer, called the circle to order and initiated a series of Down-Downs. Hollow Legs displayed what we all assumed to be the highly gratifying results of his latest foray into cosmetic surgery but which proved, disappointingly, to be merely a mask. Visitors from Mansfield were Down-Downed for thinking pineapples grew on trees and for allowing the Mansfield Brewery to close down. The lost leaders from Run 114, 69Forever, Old MacDonald, Merry Can-Can, Rolo (deputising for the absent Iron Lady), and Scotch Tape were Down-Downed for failing to justify their Trailfinders badges. 69Forever was disgustingly deprived of his due when the Compass Award for inadvertent inattention to marked trails wasgiven to Scotch Tape instead of to a much more deserving digresser. Justice finally caught up with the chancers from Cha Am when Sparky, Long Ron, and Mickey Mou were Down-Downed for late coming and shortcutting, and justice was doubly served when the beer was found to have run out (these Mansfield people again) and they had to Down-Down WATER! In the absence of beer and to avoid isolationism, Miserable Dave You Cannot Underestimat Neurotics’ Thirsts closed the circle and some of the survivors sought pies and peace at Kim’s Kitchen. Scotch Tape
Hua Hin Darts League
Division 1
Team P W D L PF -PA Pts
JW Black 12 10 1 1 83-37 21
CAT 12 8 2 2 76-44 18
Jungle Juice 11 7 2 2 72-38 16
Pink Flamingo 12 6 2 4 65-55 14
Johnnie Walker Red 12 7 0 5 63-57 14
Dicks Office A 12 3 0 9 41-79 6
Bamboo Grove 11 2 0 9 36-74 4
Jaew Bar 12 0 1 11 32-88 1
Division 2
Team P W D L PF -PA Pts
Mojos Trio 10 10 0 0 76-24 20
Butterfly Rock 12 8 1 3 78-42 17
Lazy Daze 9 5 2 2 54-35 12
Dicks Office B 10 5 1 4 59-41 11
God Friends 10 3 1 6 39-61 9
Love Bar 9 2 0 7 24-66 4
Bamboo Shoots 6 1 0 5 24-36 2
Déjà vu 8 0 1 7 15-65 1
Top 10 - Division 1
Name B ar Sgl D bls Ton’s Clss 180s pts
Stuart JJ 55 54 84 49 0 244
Tao CAT 40 45 56 34 0 175
Tao JWB 40 42 55 34 0 172
Dicky JWB 50 36 43 37 0 166
Noi CAT 45 42 47 32 0 166
Golf PF 30 42 47 37 1 158
Ana JWR 25 39 33 32 0 129
Rune PF 35 45 13 32 0 125
M JWR 40 30 23 31 0 124
Peter JJ 35 24 30 32 0 121
Top 6 - Division 2
Name B ar Sgl D bls Ton’s Clss 180s pts
Howard M J 35 39 32 33 0 139
Mick M J 40 45 20 29 0 134
Eero E 35 45 19 34 1 134
Martin LD 45 21 26 31 0 123
Ben D OB 25 37 20 26 0 108
Andy GF 30 30 8 25 0 93
March fixtures
Wek 17 – 4th March 2008
Division 1
Bamboo Grove v Jaew
Jungle Juice v JW Red
CAT v Pink Flamingo
JW Black v Dicks Office A
Division 2
Eero v Bamboo Shoots
Dicks Office B v Love Bar
Good Friends v Déjà vu
Lazy Daze v Mojos Trio
Week 18 – 11th March 2008
Cup Final
Week 19 – 18th March 2008
Top 16
MONGKOL CHILDREN’S SPORTS ACADEMY
With so few facilities for kids to enjoy locally the Mongkol Children’s Sports Academy is being set up. Golf and a 5-a-side football league are planned initially, with badminton to follow. Children of all ages are invited to join, with evenings being set aside for golf coaching and games followed by supper,
and an evening or weekend afternoon for a soccer league. It is hoped that a former
professional soccer player/coach will help out. The venture should be starting towards the middle of March 2008. The venue will be the Mongkol Driving Range, which has excellent facilities and a fine teacher to help the golf students, whilst a new soccer pitch for 5-a-side games will be close by. The restaurant there will act as the clubhouse. The idea of the organisers is to create a club atmosphere for children of all ages to enjoy, and hopefully they will expand the activities, dependant upon the interest shown. Parents of local children who would like more information please contact in the first instance: Roger Smith, 086-165 7528 One of the featured games is FUTSAL - a whole new ball game, encouraging & developing creative play, 1 & 2 touch soccer, quick decision making, individual skill, and lots of shooting in a fast paced, fun and competitive environment Also 5-a-side Soccer allows you to play a high-energy game of 5-a-side soccer every week in the new local league or in a seasonal tournament. A tournament has been agreed and will be sponsored by the OBSERVER, your local Hua Hin magazine
Bangkok International Sevens Rugby
The 14th Bangkok International Sevens is going to be held from 31st October to 2nd November 2008 in Bangkok, and the team roster is being arranged now, with invitations having been sent out to clubs worldwide. Please see the website http://www.bangkoksevens.com/tournament/teams/ for current team confirmations and registrations of interest. Once again the Tournament will include an Open Men’s and Open Women’s Sevens, a Veteran’s Division and a Boys U15s, 15-aside “Rugby Challenge” for 16-20 Thai High Schools. Full details can be found on the website at www.bangkoksevens.com Sponsors who have already pledged their support include:
Montpelier Thailand; Woods Bagot Thailand – Women’s Sevens; XPotential, UK – Boys’ “Rugby Challenge”; Royal Benja Hotel; The Londoner Pub; Enquiries re team entry, sponsorships and support programs can be referred by telephone or email to Dave Dufall, Managing Director, Brunsworth Limited & Chairman, Bangkok Sevens Tel/Fax: (66-0-2) 249 1834 Mobile: (66-0-8) 1822 5932 Email: davedufa@lox1.loxinfo.co.th
CURRENT DREAM TEAM
Not much change in the positions this month with the top 3 only separated by 28 points and not much between them and the chasing pack. This time of the season is notoriously difficult to navigate with players picking up injuries in the busy schedule and others losing the good form from previous. Equally everyone will be trying to second guess the selection policies of the various
real life managers, notably the erratic Benitez at Liverpool, as they shuffle their pack from week to week to rest players. The Dream Team is not too surprising with 5 players from the top two teams but interestingly none from Chelsea. Good luck to all players, especially our two new entrants, who although they have little or no chance of winning, can still try and catch those above them.
TM LM Team Total
1 1 The Masters 1423
2 2 Mr ChaAming 1407
3 3 Bamboo Grove 1395
4 5 Gusto Creative 1368
5 4 Cargon Apinat 1367
6 7 Nightwatch FC 1335
7 6 Wanderlust United 1320
8 8 Chalees Thaitan Army 1297
9 9 Zephyr Valley 1291
10 10 Simply Red 1284
11 11 FC KP.fi 1279
12 12 Eazelocool 1255
13 13 Ligibo FC 1220
14 14 Finlanders 1113
15 15 LoNneY 1015
16 16 Hatori FC 675
17 NEW CirCle And SqUarE 111
18 NEW MaNcHeStEr UniTeD 110 Fon ’s 22nd birthday, on 10 Fe b,
with her mum in the red dres and her aunt in the yellow shirt.
CURRENT DREAM TEAM
GOALKEEPERS
James Portsmouth 116
Defenders
Lescott Everton 139
Laursen Aston Villa 137
Ferdinand ManUnited 131
Midfielders
Ronaldo ManUnited 168
Fabregas Arsenal 151
Gerrald Liverpool 135
Petrov ManCity 130
Forwards
Adebayor Arsenal 150
Tevez ManUnited 128
Berbatov Tottenham 126
The Observer has set up a Fantasy League at http://fantasy.premierleague.com/
Just join on the website, and to join our league enter the code 129396-29572.
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